Good things and waiting. Apparently they go hand in hand.
But how long must I wait?
I love someone.
I have for many years.
But our "On-again-Off-again" relationship has been more off than on.
Especially for the past two years.
Put on hold for a career that can't wait...or rather...won't wait.
And all the while, her feelings for me grow stronger.
Yet my feelings seem to dwindle with every goodbye.
It's getting to the point that i fear that one day, I shall hate the sight of her....and then she'll be ready to come home for good.
It's a horrifying thought to think that I may hurt someone simply by moving on.
But what more can i do?
How long should I wait?
Maybe I've already waited long enough.
Quite a few of my friends already think that.
In fact, I have one who wants to take me out to bars, specifically to pick up. (which is a strange thing to hear from a female, normally that's a male line)
Whatever.... maybe one day it will become clearer.
Maybe one day, I'll find someone who blows me away, physically and mentally. Someone amazing enough to make me forget about her.
But until then...I guess I'll just continue my hermetical life.
Basking in the nothingness of my apartment...banging away on various projects..such as that one painting that i started over a month ago but haven't gotten around to finishing because i've "convinced" myself that i need some different brushes.
but at least I have Kreatcher to keep me company...i just wish he'd stop believing that my feet are chew toys.
peace.